Secrets, habits & stuff

uno Try to not have secrets. If anybody says, "Don't tell anybody this..." then that probably means it's not cool. Unless it's a surprise party, or PostSecret (or maybe if you're punking someone in a good way) - then ... well, that's totally cool. But, in general, if someone tells you not to tell anybody this - it is not a good thing. It is triple turbo-uncool if a grown-up tells you this and it makes you feel creepy. You'll know the creepy feeling when it hits, if you ever have to. It's there, you'll just feel it. If it gives you the eeby-jeebies, then tell another grown-up, don't hold it in.

dos Make your bed and put your stuff away where it belongs. Don't even ask me for all the reasons this is a good thing, just trust me. Doing these two things, and making them part of your every single day, will make you happier and less harried. Just make your bed every morning before you leave for the day and put your stuff away. It's not like I'm asking you to dig trenches. It would be nice if you could learn to do those "hospital corners" though....  
I'm just sayin' ...

tres Know that buying stuff and owning more and more stuff is never going to make you happier. You are sufficiently happy as you are, and buying and owning all that stuff is not going to fill whatever holes you may have in your soul. Get what you need, get some of what you like and then stop. Buy meals with your family or buy an adventure to the country, but stop buying stuff already. This is crazy.

Remember to buy American made when and where ever possible. Trust me ~ This matters.

copyright 2010 moemasters

Going, hearing and getting small

one Never miss the opportunity to pee. You may not think you have to go, and you may really not have to go, but if you missed, like, the last opportunity and your day is scheduled up tight with stomping out fires or road-trips - you will be one sorry child if you know that you could have gone but didn't. Just try.
(Props to my friend Jody for reminding me of this)

two Pay attention to what you hear. Listen to people speak and get to know the sounds that surround you and their effect on your well-being. To that end: Get out of the city as often as you can. Parks can tide you over, but get all the way out of the city to a place where you don't even feel the city vibe. Then, listen to what you hear there.

three If you ever want to feel really small: Put on some gigantic clothes and shoes. Try and find something absurdly huge and wear it as an accessory. How ever it works out best for you, but it's a nice quick fix to the "Do these jeans make my butt look big" blues ... just find a pair of gigantic shoes or a nicely-pressed button-down-the-front crisp cotton shirt that is about 2 sizes too big. It never fails to make me feel small.

copyright 2010 moemasters

Laptops, pajamas and moments

pierwszy If you have a laptop that is being more than just a little warm to the touch, on the bottom - it's time to invest in some good Blue Ice packs. I would love to imagine a world where laptops don't overheat, but I don't see it on the immediate horizon. So, learn how to cool it down and not jack-up your laptop. Wrap some blue ice in a bandana or something, and place it under the machine where it feels the hottest. Those little fans, so far - for me, have been over-priced junk. But, again, maybe there in the future you guys have worked out the kinks. If not: Cool it down and keep it dry. Move it often and work by a good window fan.

drugi People don't really wear their pajamas out in public. I know you may have seen some people do it, but for real, baby. If you've got the energy to leave the house, you've got the energy to put on some clothes. I'd rather not see you in your PJs, out of your house, unless you are fleeing some kind of life-threatening disaster. When you are still a kid it's okay to wear them to the drive-in with your parents, but that's about it.

trzeci Squeeze the life out of every single moment. We are all only given so many of them and they are crazy-fragile. Seriously. Some are gonna rock, some are gonna rock less - but, be all up in it as much as you can. You never know when one of those magic moments is going to happen - it'd sure be a shame to miss it. We only get so many, y'know?

Engage. Be engaged. Be engaging. Ask questions.

copyright 2010 moemasters

Lights, nails and smackers

egy Please turn off the lights behind you.
For real.
If you are leaving the room, the lights do not need to be on. And, why (on earth) would you even turn on lights when you've got a good south window? Pay attention to the tax you place on The Grid. Our grid, here in America in 2010, is seiously in need of repair and/or replacement.

Were it only that we weren't distracted by the bright and shiny things (like making enough money to feed our families and keep them under a roof) - we would be able to stare at this for what it is. We would then be able to build the resolve that will be necessary for us to get current and re-think the way we all find our power. Mind your consumption, baby.

Turn off the lights, for Pete's sake.

két  Boys: Learn to keep your hands well manicured. Seriously. There are few things as creepy as a guy with long fingernails. Ick. Uber-ick. Nail biters: STOP it! That is so unbecoming and you are MUCH bigger than whatever it is that is making you bite your nails. Pay attention to your hands - people see 'em.

három No body should ever hit you. IF somebody somehow slips by your extremely well-honed and smart spidey-sense instinct, and makes their way close enough to hit you: Call the police. For real. NO hitting. (Shaking, smacking, kicking, biting, scratching or shoving.)
Ever. No matter what.
Zero tolerance on this one, baby.

copyright 2010 moemasters

Stuck faces, handshakes and kindness

innanzi tutto 

Your face, really, could get stuck like that. When you make an especially disagreeable face - it sticks with you. Seriously, just go somewhere that is thick with people and watch them. Look at the older ones - you can tell who is a malcontent and who is generally happy. My grandmother always told me this when I made my unhappy face, and she wasn't lying. It's not like I'm asking you to always keep a smile on your face, but watch the squenching up of your eyebrows and the depth of your frown. That stuff sticks after a while and you can never get rid of it.

in seguito

Hug people when you feel like it, but always shake a hand that is extended to you. There is no more sure-fire way to show your disdain for a person than to decline a handshake. Learn how to shake hands, make eye-contact and take the minute or two necessary to demonstrate your ability to be here now AND be here now nicely.

più recente

When someone says "Good Morning" to you (or good afternoon, or whatever) your job is to respond in kind. When you don't answer them or just stare at them and walk by ~ it makes them feel bad and probably, over time, will make them dislike you. (Okay, truth is: FOR sure they will not be one of your fans after about two of these.) It's rude. Don't pretend like you didn't hear it (when it's common knowledge that you can hear a whispered conversation from two rooms away, you've already blown your cover) and don't try to escape quickly and avoid eye-contact. If you're having a bad day, get over it or don't leave your home. There is no excuse for rudeness.

copyright 2010 moemasters

Youth and Beauty

primeiro Do not let your youth and beauty be wasted on you. Look at you! For real! You are fantastically beautiful (inside and out) and you're brave and strong and funny and smart. Never forget these things. Your youth is not measured by years and months, but by joy and curiosity. And, beauty is in the eye of the beholder, baby - your inner sunshine speaks volumes about who you are - never forget this. You are exactly as young as you want to be (or as old) and your beauty is far greater than you may ever know.

seguinte Empty the litter box before the house smells bad. I recommend this ONLY if you have a cat. If you don't have a cat, but you do have a litter box, well... that's just plain weird. Don't have litter boxes hanging around for no reason. If you have a cat who uses a litter box - don't expect the cat to deal with it. Seriously, that is simply not in their little cat contracts and they don't have thumbs. They would make an awful mess of it, anyways.
That aroma de gato can be a nasty slice of life that you may not notice, but I can guarantee that somebody else walking in your home will make note of.

pasado Always allow for the possibility that you may be wrong. About anything. About everything. There is just a chance you are not always right and the sooner you know this, the sooner you can avoid looking like an arrogant self-righteous weenie. You may think you know something or everything about something, but you probably don't, so exercise a little humility and learn to use the little governor in your head before you say things out loud.

copyright 2010 moemasters

SUMMER SCHOOL! BooYA!

primer 

Do NOT marry anyone until you have seen how they treat people in the service industry. You really don't want to hook-up with anyone who treats waiters/waitresses poorly. For real. This matters. Do not hang with "finger snappers" or snots. If they have never waited tables or hosted or cooked or massaged anyone... and they don't know what it takes to make other people happy - give them a Get Out Of Jail Free card and let them go. Grab a taxi and run. If they snap their fingers and get snarky: Take what's behind Door Number Three instead of more time with them. Choose anything other than that. Do what you can to make sure they OVER-tip when warranted.

segon 

If you love someone, learn how to tickle their back. Or, learn how to do whatever it is that makes them make the "O" face. It's about a whole lot more than just that one thing. Spooning is a gateway hug and can amount to a whole lot more than you may think. You love someone? Learn what blows the wind up their skirt and get good at it. Then, spend the rest of your life perfecting it. Get good, and practice, practice, practice.

tercera 

Should you ever stay over-night at a friend's house: Leave a nice little sumptin sumptin behind. You can leave a "Thank You" card or you can Bedazzle their mailbox - it really doesn't matter all that much. Represent. Make sure you leave them something special to let them know how much you appreciate their hospitality. Memorize the serendipity of surprise. Everybody loves a good surprise. Seriously. SAY THANK YOU.

Don't make me turn this car around.

Share the love, baby.

copyright 2010 moemasters