Three for Thursday

ensimmäinen  Seize the moment. Carpe Diem, for absolute real. Be in the moment that you are in because you are obviously in it and that can't be undone. So, you might as well enjoy it. It really is delicious and will never happen again, no matter how much you wish it would. Learn to love every minute for the gift that it is.

другі IF a person older than you walks in the room, and you're sitting in the only available chair: Get up. Don't make them ask. It's a sign of respect and it'll make you look cool.

第三 Even if you don't want to, you are going to have to learn to eat green stuff. Eat lots of other colors of food too, but just eat lots of green. Just about anything green will do  - Green, fresh and local if you can get it. Consider this your first installment of the "I Will Too Tell You What To Eat" series.

I wouldn't mention it if I didn't really think it mattered.

copyright thesethreethings 2010

Mother's Day Bonus Round: Three Cliche's De-Mystified

primero Dumber than a box of rocks (or a bucket of hammers) Also applies: If dumb were dirt, he'd be about an acre. In the course of a life time you will, inevitably meet someone who just doesn't have the sense to come in out of the rain and couldn't find their butt with both hands. For every single magnificently smart person, there is an stunningly clueless person. There is also everything in between. Set your expectations accordingly.

segundo Beauty is in the eye of the beholder only because nobody but you can know what you like. Try not to be judgmental about what other people like - they don't see (or hear or taste or feel) exactly what you do. Be kind.

tercio Measure twice, cut once. This applies to fabric and wood as much as anything I've dealt with. You can throw away some gigantic bank in a heartbeat by cutting a piece too short. The more expensive the material is that you are working with, the greater the chances are that something could go wrong. It seems to be exponential. Don't cut corners and think you're saving yourself time. Ever. Just measure twice and cut once. If you're, like, really tired or not well-fed - measure three times.

Sleeping on the Porch

first Sleep outside on the porch if it's ever a safe option. We had a great porch once on Oakland - we practically lived out there. In fact, most of the block lived there. Porches are incredible places to hang. If you can stay up too late there and fall asleep, I would.

second Cry if it will make you feel better. Cry if you feel like crying. Do both of these things within reason and don't ever take smack from anyone who screams "I NEVER cry!" The fact that they never cry is a much greater reflection of them, not you. Don't be a cry-baby about it, but don't think people don't cry either, because they do.
They also fart.

third You don't need a cell phone until you're old enough to call in to work. You have parents and they should know where you are and what you're doing - that's their job. I don't care if all your friends have one. You don't need it. When you get a job and can pay for it yourself: Dive in. Until then, try telepathy or use your friend's phone.

copyright 2010 thesethreethings

Fair is a Good Friend who will tell you if you're sportin' a Bad Haircut.

një Life is not fair. It never has been and never will be, so buck up. If this is part of your foundation going in, you should be fine. There are always going to be Wild Cards and fireballs lobbed at your castle right after you got the vegetables put in. Just expect the unexpected, do the right things and know that it is not always going to be fair. Hedge your bets and stand up straight.

dy Make friends, have friends and then play with your friends. It's important to have friends and to learn how to be a friend. Friends make our time here a lot more fun and safe. Being alone is a good thing too, but make sure you've got some solid simpaticos in your corner.

tre Do not cut your hair all by yourself in a dimly-lit bathroom. Nothing good will come of it and you'll have to explain yourself the next time you see a professional hair person or leave the house and go anywhere in public. Let this urge pass and you'll thank me.

copyright 2010 thesethreethings

penmanship, wealth, good shoes

1 Write. Write with a pen on paper. If you don't have a pen, find a pencil or something. If you don't have paper - do NOT write on your shoes or jeans, find a napkin. But, engage in the act of writing, not typing. Learn how to write things legibly on paper. Practice your penmanship, even if you're a boy. It's important. Have a decent signature and write Thank You notes by hand every single time you think you ought to. If you even think you ought to - you ought to. Always send your grandmother notes in the mail. You don't even have to have a reason. She will write you back and it always rocks out LOUD to get stuff from the mailbox.

2 Don't get all twisted about your fiscal health. You have to have money to survive, but wealth is something you build in your heart.  Make a living because you have to and know that the real value is in how you spend your moments - what you do and say and think... Who you choose to hang with. Don't be getting all cocky because you have a whole lot of money - it could mean nothing in an instant. Choose to sleep well, in the last slow hours of morning, instead. Money really can't buy you love.

3 Don't wear your good shoes in the garden. Seriously. Not even accidentally. Not even if you're just going to grab that one weed. We call them "Your Good Shoes" for a reason.
Sometimes I still do this and it makes me frown. If you are wearing your good shoes, don't even look at the garden.

copyright thesethreethings 2010

stuff & digits & wasps

uno Take care of your stuff. Cars, computers, clothes, bicycles and everything else that you probably like to use and possibly treasure - they don't grow on trees. My mom said this at least twice a day when we were kids. But, for real. If you've gone to the trouble of owning it (or begging for it and getting your parents to buy it) then at least have the decency to take care of it.

dos Mind your digits. If you're working with any kind of power tools (from lawn mowers and chain saws to sanders and drills) pay attention to where your body ends and the tool begins. Be careful. I have seen some nasty, nasty things resulting from people not minding their digits. (And, no - there are no links to pictures of nasty, nasty things. You are clever, I know you know what I'm talking about.)

tres If you get stung by a wasp: Find somebody with a cigarette or some chewing tobacco (I realize that this may actually be impossible to do by the time you're old enough to read this.) Stick a little wad of tobacco in  your mouth and get it all spitty (quick. like a bunny!) and then slap it on the sting. Hold this wad of nastiness on the painful bump for as long as you can stand it. There is something in the plant that sucks the venom from your body. 

Then There Were These Three

egy Don't ever play the "He Said, She Said" game. Nobody can win at that one and it makes you look bad. There are now, and have always been, exactly three sides to every single story: Yours, Theirs and The Truth. The earlier in your life that you learn this, the easier it will be. Just choose to not engage, it's disarming and I promise you'll know if you need to pick a different path. It will all work out fine.

két Learn how to always keep a good collection of "tools" in your arsenal. I have almost always had a good pocket knife, a band-aid and some duct tape within arm's reach. The longer you go about having a big life, the more you'll be able to refine your tools, so pay attention to what you always seem to need. I knew a guy who always had bread ties, and that came in handy.

három Speak slowly. I can only tell you this from a lifetime of being mostly unable to. I talk fast and it drives people crazy. Old people with sketchy ears - they just quit listening because it's too frustrating. Learn how to articulate and pronounce your words and then enunciate and don't go too fast. Do your part to stamp out muttering and say it like you mean it.